Jon Stewart Ridicules ‘Dallas Dipsh*ts’ Fearing ‘Texas Takeover’ (VIDEO)

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May 5, 2015 6:38 a.m.

Jon Stewart on Monday rushed for cover from theories surrounding the Jade Helm 15 military excersies in Texas, after conspiracy theorists, and even the state’s governor, worried the government was planning a “Texas Takeover.”

“You know who’s calling it ‘Texas Takeover?'” the host of “The Daily Show” asked. “Lonestar Lunatics. Dallas Dipshits.”

“The United States government already controls Texas, since like the 1840s, and then left and then came back — just borrow a textbook from a neighboring state, it’s all in there,” he added.

Stewart called it “adorable” that Texas Gov. Greg Abbott (R) thought the State Guard could take on the U.S. military.

“It’s like a little dog growling at a big dog, or an eight-year-old picking a fight with the Predator,” he said.

Watch the clip, courtesy of Comedy Central:

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