Ted Cruz Celebrated His Honeymoon By Stockpiling 100 Cans Of Soup

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Republican presidential candidate Sen. Ted Cruz (R-TX) rang in the newlywed life by rushing out to stock up on canned soup, his wife Heidi said Wednesday night.

Heidi Cruz recounted during a CNN town hall how when the couple returned from their honeymoon, she came home and was “completely shocked” to discover her new husband had hauled “literally a hundred cans of Campbell’s chunky soup” home from the grocery store.

“I’d never bought 100 of anything,” she explained.

“All the same kind?” Anderson Cooper asked.

“Different kinds,” the senator interjected. “Some chicken, some beef, you know.”

Heidi Cruz continued: “This was shocking to me, so we had a tough conversation about it. I said, ‘You don’t buy 100 of anything, much less canned soup. We can’t do this. I’ll be making things.’ He said, ‘No, I know you. You won’t be making things.’”

She said she woke up early the next morning to stealthily remove “every single can” from the house and return them to the store and called her mother, who “emphatically disagreed” with her problem solving tactics.

When Ted Cruz went to discover his cache of canned soups missing, his wife promised to go back and re-buy the food, she told Cooper.

Both Sen. Ted Cruz (R-TX) and his wife Heidi are “terrible” cooks, according to the senator.

h/t Gawker

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Notable Replies

  1. You married the creep, lady. Soup and all the nuts that go with it.

  2. Avatar for sjk sjk says:

    Charming. Now stay the hell away from us!

  3. when did Campbell’s start making Chunky Bullshit?

  4. I thought this was going to be some prepper story, but I guess Cruz just really likes soup.

  5. Whuyyyy, I thawt that all God-fearin’ Christian women supposta know how to cook up vittles for thar mayn.

    Insteada doin’ lahk she’z supposta and leanrt from her mamma, she musta went to that thar Ellie Mae Clampett peculinary school or some such while mamma was out playing cards an’ a suckin’ daywn them thar sloe gin fizzers.

    But to go agin’ whut the master of the howse wawnts, whuyyy, that thar’s a blasphemin’ uh duh Holy Word. Now you march raht back to that thar store an’ getchsef a hunnerd cans-a that thar soup like’n your husband wonted inna firs’ playce.

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