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Colin Darch, 75, was taken hostage by Somali pirates in 2008 and now lectures about the incident. Alas, when he showed up to give his lecture at the UK-based Women’s Institute last month he was greeted by dozens of women in eye-patches, swords and pantaloons who apparently thought Darch lectured on stuff like Black Beard and Captain Kid and the old-fashioned shiver me timbers style piracy.

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