In the column published Tuesday, Dowd explained that she felt the need to sample some edibles herself in order to fully report on the dawn of legal marijuana in Colorado. She nibbled on a candy bar laced with pot and the experiment didn't exactly go well for her:
But then I felt a scary shudder go through my body and brain. I barely made it from the desk to the bed, where I lay curled up in a hallucinatory state for the next eight hours. I was thirsty but couldn’t move to get water. Or even turn off the lights. I was panting and paranoid, sure that when the room-service waiter knocked and I didn’t answer, he’d call the police and have me arrested for being unable to handle my candy.
I strained to remember where I was or even what I was wearing, touching my green corduroy jeans and staring at the exposed-brick wall. As my paranoia deepened, I became convinced that I had died and no one was telling me.
Dowd's bad trip drew wisecracks on Twitter from the media set.
Okay I read the Maureen Dowd column. Honestly? It's way better if you imagine Peggy Noonan wrote it.
— Liliana Segura (@LilianaSegura) June 4, 2014
Hang on. What if @NYTimesDowd really *did* die from her weed candy bar and *we* are her afterlife?
— Jake Silverstein (@jakesilverstein) June 4, 2014
"If you think about it, we're ALL strapped to the roof of Mitt Romney's car, in a way." -- high Gail Collins
— Dan Amira (@DanAmira) June 4, 2014
I demand that someone turn this Maureen Dowd column into a sitcom pilot #TheNewsChoom http://t.co/1stjKrW62m
— James Poniewozik (@poniewozik) June 4, 2014
And I thought Maureen Dowd was high all the time. http://t.co/Irgk3ojB6i
— Margarita Noriega (@margafret) June 4, 2014