On Tuesday alone, CNN anchors calculated that it would take almost 3,000 years to find the plane if search teams scoured every ocean on the planet before turning their attention to analyzing literal garbage.
"One place that they haven't looked for the plane, as far as I can see, is up their own a**holes," Stewart said.
Even when there's a new disaster that briefly distracts the network from its missing plane coverage, like last week's earthquake in California, Stewart noticed CNN still works itself into a tizzy of speculation.
"CNN actually seems to be bored with the idea of reporting real things that have happened," he said. "They've decided they no longer want to be pigeonholed in the nonfiction section."
Watch below, courtesy of Comedy Central: