Stephen Colbert was gung-ho about protecting the environment until he read a new report that said an ice sheet in Antarctica is melting at a unstoppable rate — so he decided to just say “f*ck it.”
“F*ck it. Unstoppable melting, it’s out of our hands now. I mean what a relief,” he said on Wednesday’s “The Colbert Report.” “I didn’t think it would happen, but we finally ran the clock out on the possibility of my personal sacrifice making a difference.”
He then pointed out that Sen. Marco Rubio (R-FL) was spreading the same “message of hope” when the senator said Sunday that human activity doesn’t have an impact on the environment.
“Yes, there are no actions we can take today,” Colbert quipped. “An action on Sunday might have helped, or any day before that, but now that’s all water under the bridge.”
Unfortunately for Rubio, the Antarctic thaw could trigger a 12 foot sea level rise that would eventually put Miami Beach underwater.
“Okay Miami. If you love LeBron James playing basketball, you’ll love him playing water polo,” Colbert said.
Watch below, courtesy of Comedy Central:
“F*ck it. Unstoppable melting, it’s out of our hands now. I mean what a relief,” he said on Wednesday’s “The Colbert Report.” “I didn’t think it would happen, but we finally ran the clock out on the possibility of my personal sacrifice making a difference.”
Thanks Stephen. I hope Rubio takes time to read TPM
The unfortunate thing is that Colbert isn’t wrong. We are exactly that close to having fucked ourselves irretrievably. The best thing that could happen to the planet is the extinction of the failed evolutionary experiment in biological intelligence that can foresee the results of its actions and modify them appropriately. Sadly, when we go, we’ll take everything else down with us. Homo Sapiens has become a cancer on the planet.