Shaken! NYPD Finds No Wrongdoing In Alleged Shake Shack Milkshake Poisoning

[UNVERIFIED CONTENT] Police car of the NYPD closeup
June 16, 2020 9:54 a.m.

Some of New York City’s finest spent much of Monday evening believing that they had fallen victim to a milkshake poisoning.

The allegedly venomous milkshakes were served at a lower Manhattan Shake Shack, where three officers immediately fell ill after consuming the frothy beverages.

Unions representing NYPD officers immediately took umbrage at the milkshake-provoked disturbance, which saw the three officers immediately hospitalized.

New York City Patrolmen’s Benevolent Association President Patrick Lynch released a statement saying “when New York City police officers cannot even take meal without coming under attack, it is clear that environment in which we work has deteriorated to a critical level.”

The Detectives’ Endowment Association took it a step further, directly accusing the Shake Shack employees of having “intentionally poisoned” the officers with “a toxic substance, believed to be bleach.”

But the concerns were all for nought.

The officers were reportedly discharged from the hospital on Tuesday.

The NYPD’s detectives themselves opened an investigation, only to discover that the issue was not poisoning.

Rather, the investigation reportedly found, the incident was likely due to cleaning bleach accidentally staying on the milkshake machine.

Shake Shack expressed relief in a tweet.

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