Rugged Prep Schooler Hawley Bemoans War On The Manly Man

ORLANDO, FLORIDA - FEBRUARY 26: Sen. Josh Hawley (R-MO) addresses the Conservative Political Action Conference being held in the Hyatt Regency on February 26, 2021 in Orlando, Florida. Begun in 1974, CPAC brings toge... ORLANDO, FLORIDA - FEBRUARY 26: Sen. Josh Hawley (R-MO) addresses the Conservative Political Action Conference being held in the Hyatt Regency on February 26, 2021 in Orlando, Florida. Begun in 1974, CPAC brings together conservative organizations, activists, and world leaders to discuss issues important to them. (Photo by Joe Raedle/Getty Images) MORE LESS
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A lot of things happened. Here are some of the things.

Won’t Anyone Think Of The Macho Men

Sen. Josh Hawley (R-MO) on Monday released a copy of his keynote speech at the National Conservatism Conference the day before, and it’s a deeply embarrassing ode to the apparently dying breed of “masculine” men at the hands of the Woke Left.

  • Hawley accused the left of plotting to “give us a world beyond men” and orchestrating an “assault on the masculine virtues,” while he also insisted in the same speech that “I am not here tonight to tell you that men are victims.”
  • Those “manly virtues” are “courage, and independence, and assertiveness,” according to Hawley, and American liberty apparently collapses without men specifically possessing those virtues.
  • The GOP senator also blamed feminism for men binging on porn and video games.

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All Eyes On Virginia

It’s Election Day!

  • The closely watched, over-analyzed, fit-it-to-your-preferred-narrative Virginia governor’s race between former Gov. Terry McAuliffe (D) and Trump-endorsed Glenn Youngkin (R) will finally be over.

Critical Race Theory Panic In One Video

A voter says critical race theory is the most important issue in the Virginia gubernatorial race–while fully admitting he doesn’t know what it is.

  • “I don’t have that much knowledge on it, but it’s something that I don’t care for,” he told an interviewer from “The Good Liars” comedy troupe.

MTG Racks Up Massive Bill For Her Ongoing Anti-Mask Stunt

Professional far-right troll Rep. Marjorie Taylor Greene (R-GA) is being forced to cough up at least $48,000 in fines for repeatedly flouting the requirement to wear a mask while in the House chamber.

  • She’s refused to wear a mask at least 20 times since May, House Sergeant-at-Arms William Walker noted in a letter to the Georgia Republican sent on Oct. 28.
  • House lawmakers are fined $500 for the first strike in violating the mask mandate, then $2,500 for each offense afterward.

Trump-Endorsed Candidate’s Wife Testifies On Alleged Abuse

Laurie Snell, the wife of Pennsylvania Senate candidate Sean Parnell who is seeking a divorce, testified under oath in a child custody trial on Monday that he allegedly strangled her until she bit him to get free, and that the GOP candidate abused their kids.

  • The candidate denied his wife’s accusations. He claimed that he “never raised a hand in anger” toward Pell or their children, and that his wife’s allegations don’t “have any basis in fact or truth.”
  • Parnell is now the second Trump-endorsed candidate who’s been accused of domestic abuse. Herschel Walker, a GOP Senate candidate in Georgia, allegedly threatened to kill both his ex-wife and his ex-girlfriend.

GOPer Behind Bogus Arizona Election ‘Audit’ Calls It Quits

Arizona Senate President Karen Fann (R), who commissioned Cyber Ninjas’ joke of an election audit that ended up finding absolutely nothing but apparently more votes for Biden than originally counted, announced yesterday that she won’t be seeking reelection in 2022.

  • Fann said she looked “forward to a successful session in 2022 advancing policies that benefit all Arizonans,” and “then enjoying the life my husband and I have built for ourselves in retirement with our family.”

Biden Tackles Methane Emissions

The Biden administration on Tuesday unveiled sweeping limits on methane emissions, the second biggest greenhouse gas contributor to climate change after carbon dioxide, as the President attends the U.N.’s global summit on climate change.

  • The new rules set aim to plug methane leaks from oil wells and pipelines.
  • Biden vowed to work with the E.U. to cut down on methane emissions by at least 30% by 2030 worldwide.
  • The President apologized to world leaders for Trump’s withdrawal from the Paris Accord, which the U.S. rejoined via executive order on Biden’s first day in office.

Rev. Jesse Jackson Hospitalized

The 80-year-old civil rights icon has been admitted to the hospital after suffering a fall and hitting his head at Howard University.

Abbott Weirdly Accuses Libraries Of Providing Porn

Texas Gov. Greg Abbott (R) sent the Texas Association of School Boards (TASB) a letter yesterday demanding that they get rid of “pornography” and “inappropriate content” in school libraries, though he didn’t provide any examples of whatever material he was complaining about.

  • The TASB has no idea why TF the governor sent them the letter. The group said in a statement that they were “confused” by the demand given that the board “has no regulatory authority over school districts” and “does not set the standards for instructional materials, including library books.”

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Notable Replies

  1. Actually men have always liked porn and video games.

  2. Those are two different things?

  3. It was always thus: repug and freakazoid men completely un-self-aware of what they are revealing about themselves.

    The same men refuse to hear or believe that nothing turns a woman on like a man doing housework.

    • The TASB has no idea why TF the governor sent them the letter. The group said in a statement that they were “confused” by the demand given that the board “has no regulatory authority over school districts” and “does not set the standards for instructional materials, including library books.”

    Abbott is also demanding The International Longshoremen’s Association do a better job of accurately rating movies before their theatrical release.

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