Savaging Sen. Ted Cruz’s (R-TX) announcement of his candidacy on Monday, Jon Stewart finally got to work his magic on a declared presidential candidate.
“Was there big news today for Republicans? Or maybe me?” Stewart began.
Among the many hiccups in Cruz’s big moment at Jerry Falwell’s Liberty University: students could be seen wearing Rand Paul t-shirts, others on their cell phones. All of them turned out to have been forced to attend the announcement as part of a weekly assembly.
But Stewart focused on Cruz’s passionately delivered, third-person autobiography.
“Imagine another teenage boy being raised in Houston,” Cruz said, “heading off to school over 1,000 miles away from at a place where he knew nobdy, where he was alone and scared.”
“Dude,” Stewart deadpanned. “You went to Princeton.”
“Don’t make it sound like you got forced onto the train to Hogwarts,” he added.
Watch the clip, courtesy of Comedy Central:
Typical tea party fucktard. Here’s a reminder, Mr. Cruz- you’re running for president, not dictator, and you’d never be able to abolish the IRS and any other of the stupid shit you’re preaching. But republicans will eat that shit up, they love being lied to.
cruz is just so full of himself.
And THAT will be his undoing. That I could readily see, now that he has a “stage” all his own.
Looks like 33733 gets you set up for Heritage Foundation alerts. Wonderful.
Living under tyranny sure sucks. I mean, I can’t even golf on the weekends anymore without having to look at my local course’s groundskeeper - a likely illegal immigrant although I’m not really sure but he’s brown so highly likely. Thanks Obama! Save us Ted!
Texting “Constitution” to 37299921919 right now!