The Rise Of The Anti-Secession Petitions

November 13, 2012 1:43 p.m.

Thousands of petitioners are demanding the White House let them secede from America. Thousands more are petitioning the White House to just kick them out already and be done with it.Since President Obama’s re-election last week, the White House website, which offers Americans a chance to gather signatures to demand an official response from the administration, has seen a flood of petitions aimed at securing a peaceful exit from the union for various states. One petition demanding the administration “grant the State of Texas to withdraw from the United States of America and create its own NEW government” has secured over 83,000 signatures. The White House has said it will respond to any petitions that receive backing from 25,000 people or more.

The movement has drawn enough attention to prompt several top Republican politicians and commentators to distance themselves from it. Now it’s spawning a counter-movement of satirical counter-petitions.

A petition to “Deport Everyone That Signed A Petition To Withdraw Their State From The United States Of America” has already gained over 7,500 signatures.

Another one asks the president to “sign an executive order such that each American citizen who signed a petition from any state to secede from the USA shall have their citizenship stripped and be peacefully deported.” It has over 4,440 signatures.

Liberal blogger Dave Waldman took a more absurdist approach with his petition: “Peacefully grant the State of Herp-a-Derp to withdraw from the United States of America & create its own NEW government.” It concludes with a plea to “please keep sending my Social Security check. I earned that, yo.”

Asked for comment, Waldman told TPM, “I actually don’t have anything to add. There’s no deeper hidden meaning or anything.”

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