Brush With Greatness

I was at the White House Correspondence Association Dinner this weekend. As you can probably imagine, it is a fairly ridiculous affair, with celebrities, political celebrities, hangers on and one massive ballroom jammed so tight with tables that you literally have a hard time backing your seat out even to stand up. Doctors advise applying a thick layer of irony before going in to make it out with your dignity intact.

But this time I did have a peak experience.

Not long before the dinner was getting underway the military color guard was making its way toward the dais at the front of the ballroom. There are various people milling about, despite the parade like music playing as they make their way forward toward the stage. So as this is happening and I’m talking to someone and people are milling about I hear this voice talking in the opposite direction but just behind me, “Hey, everybody move aside, this is our color guard. Hey. You. Stand aside. Hey. Hey You. Yeah You. This is the color guard. This is very important.”

So I look over at what’s going on because, damn, I know that voice. As soon as I wheeled around mix of the hair and the voice give it away: it’s Donald Trump, jumping into the breach to help the US military. Even though I don’t think they needed any help because I’ve been to this a few times and they make it up to where the President is sitting each time. You don’t stand in the way of these guys.

So I reached out from behind and grabbed Trump’s padded shoulder and said “Great work, Mr. Trump. Great work. Thank you.”

He turned to me, momentarily uncertain, then snapped back into Trump and said, “You’re welcome. You’re welcome. It’s important. I’m here.”

Me: “Well, good work, Mr. Trump. I am glad you were here to deal with this.”

Trump: “It’s important.”

Hand shake. Pat on the back. Some sort of rat pack type hand gesture.

Trump walked off to shoo more people.

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