hey did you guys see this hilarious photoshop i made of john kerry getting a purple heart for a windsurfing accident

look if you don't see this for the epitome of wit that it is maybe it's time you laid off the lattes, buddy!!!!

I kinda liked #9, too. And #5 wasn't so bad. Still, Desi shouldn't give up his day job.

That said, many liberals do not want to laugh at Obama, but I think it's really because they're taking this election so seriously and really feel the need to win more than anything else. Jon Stewart is not part of the problem, however, and in fact has called attention to it himself.

How about a compromise: we'll start laughing at Obama after the election. Meanwhile, we'll just laugh at McCain and/or Bush. (Or any Republican, for that matter. Lieberman's fair game as well.) Okay? ;)

#3 is not funny, at all.

The rest could be funny if I were sitting in a bar and inebriated well beyond being able to handle a car. You know, at that point where one laughs besnottedly at anyone or anything in the vicinity.

Oh, ok, the rest are funny.

Where'd you get these jokes? Jay Leno's trash can?

D, I applaud the effort, but the problem is not that it's tough make jokes about Obama. Rather, it's tough to make funny jokes about Obama.

But in the spirit of the thread, here are some of my best efforts in the past. (Admittedly not my best work.)

Obama's pickup line:

Hey baby. What's your name? I'm Barack Obama. You look like you could use a little Obama-magic. I'll make your toes tingle, electricity up and down your leg. I don't even have to touch you, just whisper a few words in your ear. Just words, you say? Are these just words? [Whispers in her ear] Really, you've heard those word before? Why are you so cynical, baby? We've got potential. We can do incredible things together. Yes, that's what I like to hear. Yes, baby, yes. Feel the hope. Yes we can. Yes we can. Yes we can!

If a candidate picked you up at a bar...

Obama's synchronized swimming routine:

Genghis: Interesting. So I've heard that you intend to put 50,000 performers in an olympic size pool. Is that accurate? I have to say, I don't see how that's possible.

Barack: We're not releasing our numbers right now, but let's just say that there will be a lot of supporters in that pool. Understand this, in Washington people like to tell you what you can't do. They said that we couldn't win the nomination with a message of hope. Now they're saying that we can't fit 50,000 people in a pool. Tell him, Michelle...

Michelle: Yes, we can.

Genghis: Have you ever done this before?

Barack: As an organizer in Chicago, I set up a synchronized swimming team to offer hope to poor kids. The only available pool on the south side was a wheelbarrow of dirty water. Thousands of kids wanted to participate, so we had to get creative.

Dance Dance Nomination, Part II

Partisans at Obama's Chicago Headquarters today revealed important details on his plan to get US troops out of Iraq. They're redrawing precinct boundaries to make Anbar part of Armenia.

Des, when does the healing start?

No one risks being the lamest in this thread, so voilà:

At the Elysée Palace, Carla Bruni, Europe's former first courtisan, now France's first lady, works her exquisitely pedicured toes under the dinner table toward US President Barack Obama's ankle. Host President Sarkozy wonders out loud, "Is France's first lady not enough to your likeeeng?" Diplomatically, Barack responds, "Oh, she's likable enough." Barack then smilingly admits, "I certainly was not expecting such audacity of grope!" First Lady Michelle Obama's fist bump up her husband's jaw could not have been swifter.

Bloody political advisors & spin doctors KNOW politicians HAVE to be humanized. Thus, the kids, and pets and shirtsleeves and bowling and SNL and all that other shit. Everyone knows politicians have to present a false-face, and people - one way or another - want to see what's behind it. Your enemies will work hard to fill it in with something frightening. And humor allows you to connect what you're saying out front with what's in behind. There's not as many ways to do this as there used to be - fewer boozy evenings with reporters, less family access.

And then the Obama campaign gets handed the best opportunity he had to get humanized - Vero Possumus - and they freakin' blew it. He coulda gone on Late Night, told an amusing little lead-in, about how he'd asked a young staffer to translate 'Yes We Can' into Latin, for an official campaign seal. Then had that "Vero Possumus" translation flashed up behind him alongside his new Campaign Animal (possum).... I bet people would howl. I'd even bet ya he could've said that since only his Democratic supporters seemed to feel comfortable with "Yes We Can" chants, maybe everyone could join in on a "Vero Possumus" chant. You want to puncture that humorless, elitist, intellectual thing? Makes me wanna pull my tubes out.... Fark.

A well-known ad agency was disappointed this week to have Barack Obama turn down their "Audi of Hope" promotion.

Yeah, I laughed on that one, a

Michelle in a candid interview described their early marital years in the tough South Side. She once asked Barack to take out the garbage. Police found it floating face down in the Chicago River.

Can they be really bad jokes? (the Martians will get them):

Checking in for his flight, Obama is told there’s a surcharge for excess baggage now. He asks Reverend Wright if he’d mind being a carry on.

President Obama, Castro, and Ahmadinejad have a summit meeting. Ahmadinejad presents Obama and Castro with beautiful Persian rugs. Castro then presents the others with the finest Cuban cigars. In turn, Obama gives the two leaders Hallmark cards wishing hope for good fortune and blessings some day.

Barack Obama, Saddam Hussein and Osama bin Laden are sitting in a bar. “Put it on my tab.”